I can't wait to be able to wear cute clothes again and not be afraid of standing out, of looking fat. I want to wear dresses without my thighs rubbing together, to wear heels with my head held high. I want to know that when I catch someone looking at me, it's because I'm beautiful, not fat. I want to put on a cute dress, go to a club and dance my ass off knowing that I'm the hottest bitch there. I've been dreaming of all the clothes I want to buy when I can wear anything and look amazing in it. The thought of going into a store and picking up a pair of size 2 jeans knowing they're going to fit is what keeps me going. Feeling small and beautiful in my boyfriend's arms makes every workout worth is. Thinking about seeing my hipbones again makes the hunger go away. This is not who I am. I am not some chubby, average loser. I'm a smart, fashionable, glamorous, sexy college student with the world at my feet. I'm going to use everyday to show the world who I really am. I'm not going to waste another day being average because I can't think of anything worse.
I've been keeping up the routine: 1200 calories, 1 hour workouts. Consistency is key. And I have another 22 days at my mom's house before I move in with my boyfriend. Here it's easy, so I better make the most of this month. With him, there will be a lot more temptation to resist. But I told him that I don't want any junk food in the house and I hope that he respects that. I'm hoping that by Christmas I can be close to my goal of 115. That's basically 10 pounds a month, which I think is totally doable. I just have to stay on track, stick to my plan. I need to reach my goal because I cannot wait to go shopping. I love clothes and who doesn't love shopping when they're a size 2? The plan is to ask for money for Christmas and use that to buy a whole new size 2 wardrobe. I want it. Bad.
Today we're going out to sea with a nautical inspired post! Enjoy it and stay strong. We're going to look like that one day soon. Skinny love <3
"I want to put on a cute dress, go to a club and dance my ass off knowing that I'm the hottest bitch there"
ReplyDeleteI feel the same exact way! My boyfriend and I go to clubs every so often and I always feel like the biggest bitch in there surrounded by skinny girls in their dresses and one piece rompers and such :(
Keep your goals realistic and keep strong and nothing will be impossible! You will be the hottest bitch in the club, and when you get those size 2 jeans put them on and send us a picture!
I feel the exact same about every word you have typed.
ReplyDeletewell, I doubt I'll ever get my ass into a size 2, but the plan is a size 5 and I think I can to it :)
Let's all do this together.
I think i'm going to steal your idea of imagining picking out jeans whenever I'm hungry... :)
Hi I'm new around here :)
ReplyDeletebut wanted to drop in and say - I was loving that sentence too-
"Dance my ass off knowing that I'm the hottest bitch there" What an wonderful feeling that is.
Also throwing on whatever is clean knowing its going to look hot. - This is something I envy about a super skinny friend. She can go out in just a baggy shirt, tights and boots and still look amazing.
I also adored all your nautical pictures Skinny love. Thank you.
♥